Next time say hello to the lion and pat the lion trainer on head
When doing electrical work try not to forget that wearing clothes dried with static free sheets isn't a substitute for turning the power off
This time before testing a new Raccoon hat for size make sure it's dead
Get a smart person to draw a big L and R on my hands, so if asked to raise my right hand there won't be that awkward moment
From now on brush my tooth every week!
Get me somebody to learn me how to fly one of them there space shuttle thingys so I can give them spacey aliens a wrastling they won't forget.
Plan ahead for those nights when I've counted every sheep and still haven't fallen asleep. Buy more sheep!
This year use soap and water for underarms instead of chicken bullion. It's cheaper and I'll probably have a lot less stray cats following me
Figure a way to force technically superior beings from a distant galaxy to do my chores. Then figure a way to get to that distant galaxy and bring them here.